When we avoid addressing a conflict, we think we are keeping the peace. In reality, we are just trading external harmony for internal resentment. Those small "kinks" in a relationship—the things we choose not to mention—eventually become the lens through which we see the other person. Straightening it out is the only way to see the truth again. How to Start the Conversation
There is a profound lightness that comes after a difficult, honest conversation. Even if the resolution isn’t perfect, the "tangle" is gone. You no longer have to guess what the other person is thinking or carry the weight of a grudge. Let's Straighten It Out
Own your part. Use "I" statements. Instead of saying, "You made me feel ignored," try, "I felt a bit disconnected after our last talk, and I wanted to check in." When we avoid addressing a conflict, we think
Listen for the "underneath." Often, the thing we are arguing about isn't the real issue. Listen for the feelings behind the facts. The Relief of Clarity Straightening it out is the only way to see the truth again